Colorful and Eccentric

So, a lot of us (if not all of us) have heard this saying, or at least something to this effect. It rings true to me every time it resurfaces though because it's just another mantra that's really difficult to live by. Emerson presents a fun challenge though. 


Here's how I see it:  First, you have to discover a little bit of who you are and accept that. You're a constantly changing character wandering through a forever evolving life. I don't know how you're supposed to fully "find" yourself as some people claim to do. All I really find myself knowing is where I want to go and stick to that--is that me?  You are what you dream of being, and your dreams are what you can't let the world change--so the answer to my question is yes.  Sure, you have to be a little realistic about all your dreams, but that doesn't mean completely throwing them away if they don't fit into the frame of some societal norm. Let yourself wander for a little bit and soul search. Shit, I'm not ready to be settled, and I never want to be boring. I hope that when I'm 40 years old I still feel the urge to dance a little in the grocery store. Okay, maybe at least be a little quirky still. I'm just saying, it seems when people start to conform to expectations and a cookie cutter life they lose the color in their world. Keeping your world colorful when there are so many things trying to whitewash it with simplicity is hard but a lot of fun. Keep it that way. 

over and out. 

Coffee and optimism

I have stumbleupon.com to thank for a lot of my inspiration.  So naturally on my day off I ended up on my computer stumbling around and ended up finding a page of quotes.  

The page I found today was chock-full of superb pictures, but this one was most applicable to my life right now--plus it inspired me to make coffee: win-win.

Alright, now to get to the actual point.  For the past year I have worked very hard on not looking too far into the future because I would worry myself sick about where I would be in a year, how I would get there, who I would be surrounded by, how I would pay for it, and blah blah blah. That's a lot of unnecessary stress, especially when I started to realize that I actually had little to no control over my future.  I mean sure, I'll go to school and finish that.  Yes, I will be living on my own, working, making my own food and whatever, but because of the twists and turns of life I knew that getting nervous about the future became pointless. So, moral of that story: I have started to accept life day-by-day more, rather than looking at it more anxiously year-by-year. It's a really relieving feeling. 


The past though--that's been haunting me lately. I think that the word depressed is a bit strong, but the past has a tendency to drag me down. I've begun to realize how quickly it can drag down my mood and day and effect my attitude towards others when I get wrapped up in it.  Letting go of my past and embracing the present is my goal right now. I have gotten better. Any sort of drama that comes my way, I really try to push aside only because it casts a shadow over the happiness that the present has to offer.  


Sometimes though, I've found that the present offers a different kind of dynamic that isn't always happiness, and I think that this quote is a little narrow in that regard.  To embrace the present you must embrace all that comes with it.  You have to fight, and you have to laugh, and you have to get really passionate, and really emotional, and really calm, and really goofy, and sometimes really intense.  To be in the present is not to be dull, but it is to completely feel everything.  When you're stuck in the past you dull your emotions because you've already felt them. You don't really know how you'll feel in the future so those are just assumed emotions, probably heightened or dreamed up. What I'm telling you is to try to live every moment you can in the present. It's damn hard, especially when you're wandering about your day, plugged into your headphones, and lost in your own mind.  When you live in the present though, you feed into optimism which leads to happiness. Just think about how great your life will be.  Do yourself a favor: don't get too caught up in the negative. And if you do, find that person in your life who can always find the silver lining. 


over and out.

Stunna

What a beautiful life I have found myself living.  Really, I think it's partially summer. I'm not consumed by books and studying.  Every day is a  new surprise and always refreshing.  


I think the reason for clarity is two-fold though.  My life is no longer overwhelmingly stressful--well, aside from work here and there--because school is out.  Certainly that helps, but I have also stopped over-thinking every minute detail of life to align the universe in some sort of order because that's not actually how life works--or at least I don't think.  Over-analysis is really a taxing habit that should be kicked because life is so, so sweet without it.

That being said, don't stop thinking all together.  Remember to stand up for your beliefs still, because those mean something too.  You still have to hold onto something, or you become nothing; and then what?  Care more about how you feel about yourself than how someone perceives you. Granted that can be one of the hardest things to avoid because conforming helps you to advance sometimes.  Comfort is far more important in many situations though.  Love who you are because if you don't, the people around you aren't really loving who you want to be.  Excuse the cliches...why are those so unavoidable in my rants? 


Moral of the story: personality drives your social life while over-analysis drives people away.  Simple. 

Over and out.